Dear Team 7
by MizuKitsune10
Summary: Oneshot. Naruto leaves, and leaves a letter to his 'Team'. What does it say? Sasuke, Sakura, and Kakashi bashing. You have been warned. Don't like, don't read.


Team 7 doesn't care for Naruto. Here's my proof. It has been edited. Thanks to KingKakashi, I've changed Naruto's pairing.

I DO NOT own Naruto. That beautiful right belongs to Masaki Kishimoto.

Dear Team 7

It was a beautiful day. Birds were singing, Tsunade was drinking, even Team 7 were happy, except for the fact that Naruto wasn't there. ''Where is that baka?!" Sakura screeched. The other two nodded in agreement. Then, a fox popped out of nowhere, gave Kakashi a letter, and poofed away. Kakashi read the note aloud to his subordinates, and it read:

Dear Team 7,

You guys don't care about me. Don't try to deny it. By the time you find this, I'll be leaving Konoha. Tsunade knows, so you losers can't kill me.

Kakashi-sensei, you told us one day, that failing missions make us trash, but abandoning comrades is worse than that.

You damn hypocrite, that same day, you and the other bastards left me on a log to burn. During the month of rest for the chunin exams, you didn't even train me. You just gave the job to another pervert who lives in Konoha. Isn't that abondoning a comrade Hatake-san? Speaking of training, what have you taught me? Tree-climbing only, a move all Gennin should know. Anything else? Nothing. Well, now you don't have to worry, cause now, I choose to stay away from Konoha.

Sakura, my so called crush, is a stupid banshee who needs to learn to shut up. You hit me for no damn reason, and for that I blame your folks. Your folks hate me, they made you hate me too. The first day I met you, you hit me, spat at me, and ran away. My crush on her was nothing but an illusion. It was either too good, or you guys are THAT bad.

Sasuke, the so called genius, you're nothing but a whiny bastard who wants power too much. You need to know that power is not given, it is earned. You're so weak, you even went to the gay snake pedophile for power. Even I, the DOBE wouldn't do that! By the way, has he ass-raped you yet?

You know, my teammates, the Rookie of the Year and Top Kunoichi should be able to identify a mask. Guess not, and that makes them bad shinobi, since we deal with masks everyday.

I don't care if you hate me, cause I am ashamed to have known you guys and I hope you die a horrible, painful death and rot in Hell. Or better yet, be tortured by Kyuubi and the other Biju. I'll be looking forward to that.I even got a better sensei, Jiraya, the Toad Sage. Tsunade has a copy of this letter, and that perverted tutor Hatake graciously dumped me with, is proving what I said is true.

You guys suck. Majorly.

Sincerely,

Namikaze Uzumaki Naruto

P.S. Ha Hatake-san! You treated Yondaime-sama/your own sensei's kid like trash. Ain't that a kicker. Tsunade knows I'm his son too. Ask her. She has blood test ids and my birth certificate tou-san signed before he died. If you lose your rank, too bad suckers! Maybe you should've though of the consequences first!

P.S.S. You like my fox summons hatake-san? Kyuu is glad I'm away from that hellhole! He says he'll teach me all he knows!

"Oh shit. we're so screwed.", Hatake said. His subordinates agreed.

The next day, Team 7 said scathing remarks about Naruto. Tsunade found out and nearly killed them, but decided to torture them instead. So, Hatake was demoted to Chunnin and Sasgay and his loyal, whore of a puppy were demoted to academy students. Hatake got D-ranks for a year and his books were burned in his sleep. He was kicked out of every bookstore and library in town too. Once Sasgay and Miss Billboard graduated, thei teams would get nothing but D-ranks until one year after the fist chunin exam their team takes.

Naruto however, became a Suna nin. He's also the new Kyuubi. Gaara, the new Kazekage, Naruto's best friend, and new Ichibi, was delighted to have Naruto in his ranks. He also broke the treaty between Konoha and Suna once he found out what happened to his best friend. Naruto married Hinata, who he finally noticed. Naruto was now a legend, and fear to all enemy nins. He now lives happily while his old team lived miserably.

Oh the irony. Life couldn't get better than that.


End file.
